Lolo and Mr. Beats
(Disclaimer: As a self-proclaimed love, sex, and relationship blogger I tell every man I date that I blog about my love life. Most LOVE it. To protect them I never use their real names or give too many details to distinguish who the person is. P.S. That's how my lawyer says I don't get sued. )
August 19th I had this magnetic attraction to this musican I'll call Mr. Beats. What follows are the vlogs that chronicled how we met and how it all fell apart. Interestingly enough two weeks before I met Mr. Beats I prayed for God to give me the spirit of a nun! Seriously. I said God, "Please take this desire for love away from me, help me walk a walk of celibacy and devote my life to service." But the prayer didn't come from a pure place. I am on a journey of reconciling my sex shame, and I thought there was no way any man could love a woman as broken as me. And, even though it didn't work out with Mr. Beats I'm wondering if there's a lesson in all of this. Here's the vlog where I first mention meeting Mr. Beats at an open mic night.
Meeting Mr. Beats
When I First Start Catching Feelings
Dating Mr. Beats brought out the romantic in me again. The intense feelings of infatuation, desire, and lust sparked my creative juices in a way I haven't felt in a super long time. Here's my first poem about him.
One Month In & I'm Feeling Insecure
Dating Mr. Beats was good for my soul. For the first time I allowed myself to be completely honest, and the fact that he wanted to continue restored a lot of hope in me.
Shortly after this vlog --- it all started to fall apart.
to be continued..... of you can subscribe and follow at Good Girl Chronicles on YouTube.
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