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Sunday, October 9, 2011

Different

Remember that night you touched my face, and gently kissed me?
It was so sweet.
There were so many intense kisses.
My mind was racing, heart pacing.
I knew your reputation.
They said you were a player, that I'd be a fool to be involved.
But, in that moment I thought I was different.
You were different.
Wrapped in your embrace, looking deeply at your face, I someone how thought we could be different.

Remember that drive in the car?
You seemed a little nervous.
And, I thought it was little cute.
We talked, and somehow I felt I was seeing a different side of you.
So I showed you another side of me.
I opened up about  my passions, my fears, my family.
Neither of us wanted to be rebound loves.
Confiding in one another, I somehow thought this was the start of something different.
In that moment I thought I was different.
You could be different.

We would cast away the mistakes we made in past loves.
We would be friends first, and we would be honest even if it hurt.
This I thought would be different.

The few dinners we had, I didn't want to end.
The talking, the conversation, the eye gazing.
You were engaged in my every word.
When you spoke I felt you believed in me.
In all your talents, I'm not sure you really believed in you.
I could see you were unsure, self conscience, and doubtful of what you could be.
You were so much like me.
I shut the door to say goodnight, and in my heart I thought this will be different.

Who knew that night, when I shut the door, I would be shutting it for good.
Closing the door on our friendship, and a trusting part of me.
Days passed with no call, no explanation at all.
I knew then I was different, I was cushioning your fall.
You were no different than those other guys..the ones that talk sweet and then leave.
A man who held onto feelings for a past love, unable to confront them.
Used women along the wall to comfort his lonliness.
No, you were no different after all.

What fool am I to expect that your words were honest, and true.
The many days, weeks, I wasted being angry with you.
How I doubted myself, and what I could give.
All so you could feel better.
You couldn't even say it to my face, you sent a stupid letter.
No you were no different at all.

You stood there and took the words because you knew they were true.
You would run back to her, not caring who your hurt or how they fell for you.

I held onto to it.
Feel bitter, let down, considered shutting down a bit.
I could not understand, why you could not be a man.
Tell me how you felt, knowing with honesty I would understand.
You may not know this about me but I am so different.

I'm not a girl you can play with and toss out.
I won't let your weakness break me.
It all make me a little bit stronger, makes my a little bit skin thicker.
And, while you were not strong enough to stand tall.
I refuse to let your weakness make me fall.
Because now I am different.

I will keep my heart a lot closer now.
I won't be so quick to trust a smooth talker.
I know now I have to keep a close eye on who I let into my life.
And, for that I thank you.
It was a lesson learned.

Some girls would crumble, give up after being played by you.
But, I thank God I am different.
And, I refused to be broken because of you.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Mr. Disney I'd like a Refund

Excuse  me Mr. Walt Disney I would like a refund. For what you ask? All the fairytale non-sense I've been buying into since I was a little girl. I  know you can't give me back the time I've spent buying into these fairytales but I think we can work something out. How about  a spot on the writing team when you all think up your next princess tale. I'd like to give it a real world spin.


Cause, I have to tell you Mr. Disney falling in love is nothing like that Cinderella, Snow White stuff you've been pushing. In the real world Mr. Disney men don't know what the hell they want. They are afraid of commitment, they stand you up, and more men are concerned with playing the field than playing prince.


In modern times, Mr. Disney real woman have to save themselves. And, we can't drop the walls of our hearts so easily anymore. We've been played so many times by dogs pretending to be princes it will take more than a few sweet kisses to win our hearts. Do you think you can put some of that realness into your next princess film ? You think you could teach our little girls to be strong, independent, and brave without a man ?


Cause the truth is, sometimes the prince doesn’t come when you want him and you’re so tired of waiting its doesn’t seem magical or lovely anymore. Mr. Disney this faiytale stuff is cute, but it's time to grow up.


 Because in the real life once the reception is over, the magical forest animals have gone back home, and if you do finally land your prince you both will find happily ever after doesn’t come easy. It doesn’t fade into black, with the lovers walking into a happy future. It’s a road paved with discovery, disappointment, heartache, and reality my friends is not always as sweet as those movies you make.


Let's talk Mickey and Minnie Mouse for example what is really going on there.  It's time for those mice to stop hiding the real stuff. I know the  old mouse doesn’t want us  to see how non-committal Minnie is, or how lonely he finds himself at home, or why things, life, circumstances never bring him and Minnie any closer to real love, commitment, or unity.

Or how about that Cinderella 2 movie. This is the movie  where you see what life is like once Cinderella finally lives in the castle.  I’ll tell you in the hour movie I only saw Prince Charming like once. Did Cinderella know she signed up for a life in which her Prince was gone all the time?  There wouldn’t be those magical, steamy romantic nights she dreamt of, because the Prince is not available. He’s out on business and she relegated to hosting castle parties, finding solace in her magical mice friends who don’t really understand. But in happily ever after, these things are never discussed. You see Prince Charming come home and somehow no love is lost between them and everything is beautiful. We all know real love doesn’t work that way.
So come on Mr. Disney either start telling the real stories or please just give me a refund. This princess is so over the fairydust, and magical tales.