Monday, February 6, 2012

The Relapse

Just looking at it makes it hard to resist the temptation. I know I should push it away, but I just have to try it. I run all those little sayings I’ve learn to say in these moments of weakness, and they are not helping.
One taste won’t hurt. Just take one bite. It will make you feel better.
Before long my fork is slicing through the spongy, chocolate cake. I pause for a second, and think, ‘A moment on the lips is a lifetime on the hips.’ But I can’t stop now it’s too late. The soft chocolate cake is swirling around in my mouth, and for a few seconds I can only feel how good it tastes. It doesn’t take long for me to finish off the whole piece of cake.  The guilt wouldn’t be so bad if this were my first relapse, but I’ve fallen in deep this time.
 For the past two ok honestly three months I’ve slide back into my old eating habits. The habits I overcame doing Weight Watchers:  mindless eating, eating when bored, eating while driving. So here I am 10lbs heavier and really ashamed it got this far.  It’s time to come clean.  I've been eating for all the wrong reasons lately. I have eaten to mask being homesick, to relax after a long day, but mostly because I love eating. But, it's time stop all that.
In the next few weeks I plan to dig out of this food relapse I’ve fallen in and get back on track. I’m running the Monument 10k March 31st and I want to back in running form. No more peanut butter and jelly sandwiches before bed, or frequent stops to the frozen yogurt joint. I’ve discovered it’s not all that healthy if you pile chocolate and candy on it. There should definitely be some kind of disclaimer at those places. No more snacking, and snacking, and snacking at work. It will be a hard road back I’m sure to slim and healthy, but I’m ready.
My challenge this week resisting temptation.

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